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a universal truth

Gender identities lie on a graded spectrum. However it appears that most people can fit reasonably well within a portion that allows them to fully identify with their birth sex.

Transgender people however, cannot entirely do so.

Some will have a gender identity that is entirely reversed from their birth sex and will more than likely end up as transgender women. Others will live in some form of partial transition while the remainder will settle for some degree of gender variance which reflects their sense of self.

The way sexual orientation plays into this dynamic is to either align or misalign with gender identification. When a person’s gender identity aligns with orientation they will be more likely to identity as transgender earlier in life whereas the opposite will be true when orientation misaligns with identity.

This universal model should apply to both male and female born individuals and makes far more sense than the scattered and confused proposals we have seen to date from t…
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complicated lives

three choices

Robert Reich has a common sense idea to deal with this disastrous presidency and it just might work....


soul connection

When I was in my teens I used to imagine that being with someone else would enable me to be close enough to them to almost peer into their soul. I thought that being in a couple could be like the meeting of two minds intertwining and almost becoming one.

Of course I was wrong because what I held in my mind's eye was an overly idyllic portrait of how things should be forgetting that we are far too wounded and guarded as human beings to expose so much of ourselves to one another. This was also before I ever dared admit to myself that I was transgender and had that massive bridge still to cross.

We crave this type of deep connection with someone but our childhood trauma gets in the way of that desire and I have never understood this paradox as well as I do now. We hope to be loved and to return it in kind but we are incapable of letting our guard down to the extent it demands because it implies exposing our weaknesses as well as our strengths to another being. Instead we bring our ba…

we call BS

Watch out Republicans they are coming after you...


busted

This was the first time I have ever been called out by someone who recognized me in male mode but it happened this past week. Young Sarah who works in a Promenades de la Cathedrale watch store saw me and was so excited that she just had to call out to me with a big wave and a booming "hello, hello!"

“I was sure you were a woman!” she tells me excitedly.

I explained to her about my transgender background and she seemed so impressed that I could live the way I do which I explained to her is far from being easy. She commented on how my delicate features could go either way which is why she had no doubt and didn't let my height be an issue because "there are so many tall women out there"

“I am so impressed by transgender people” she added and I proceeded to tell her that we tend to lead complicated lives with many of us not making it. She just stood there wide-eyed listening to every word.

Sarah is all of 24 years old, married and already the mother of a young boy.…

enough is enough

It's a tired old story by now. There is a shooting in a school, a theatre or a mall, the president gives lip service and everything goes back to normal.

This latest Florida shooting was the 18th so far this year and it's only mid February. Pretending this is normal anywhere else would be a grave cause for concern but this is America with its immunity to violent gun crime.

So roly-poly Trump goes in front of the media and decries the problem of mental health but doesn't mention guns. The GOP he ran for houses under its tent that strange concoction of people with a love of money, Jesus and guns. But that is the paradox that is this party where some Evangelicals reconcile prosperity theology with a Bible that preaches God's favor for the poor, the meek and the down trodden.

Look at that graphic below and tell me that Americans are crazier than everyone else or could it be they just have much easier access to weapons? I have written here before that an attachment to firea…