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American Tune

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the millenial generation

This is an interesting observation on the millenial generation. The perils of social media, instant gratification, learning patience and corporate greed....


NB: I am also slowly starting work on a book tentatively titled "Different" which will resemble this blog in style and discuss my origins but also this complex topic in light of everything we have learned thus far as well as offer my own analysis. Hopefully there is enough interest to warrant a release via Amazon or some other online retailer.

the gift of being wrong

We are all wrong about all kinds of things in our lives and make many errors and assumptions that are completely off the mark.

What is interesting is that as I age I am learning to be more analytical and to appreciate the value in being wrong. It has allowed me to find better and more satisfying answers to things I thought I understood.

We grow up swallowing things and accepting them verbatim and hopefully with the passage of time apply more and more discernment as a litmus test for their veracity. Hence knowing what we don't know has as much value as what we do because we can stop ourselves from solidifying an opinion until we gather more data.

Have you noticed that very ignorant people tend to be easily led into a type of thinking and buy into it like sheep? Arrogance as a flip side also breeds thinking that won't yield to contradictory evidence.

However, ignorance is not bliss either. I think that understanding one might be wrong should be the signal to dig deeper for a m…

cross gender arousal part 2

Okay, if someone takes HRT why does their desire to crossdress or transition sometimes diminish?

I wrote here yesterday how we go through puberty and become imprinted with whatever baggage we are carrying at the time which means that your sexuality has been tied to your draw towards the feminine. Hence if we remove testosterone from the equation the libido is dampened thus helping to soothe the dysphoria but also diminish the need for feminization which seems counterintuitive right? But it's not really since your dysphoria, exposed to a cold shower of estrogen, has had its sexual energy greatly diminished.

With a lower level of dysphoria the person can now decide where they reside on the spectrum but they risk being feminized physically beyond a point they are willing to go. For some people a small amount of HRT is what they need to keep their dysphoria in check without entering into a full blown transition.

When I read Susan's (from transitioning into tomorrow) post it was a…

what causes cross gender arousal?

I have pondered long and hard over a number of years now as to what could cause cross gender arousal and have come to some fundamental conclusions.

Firstly, transgender people experience cross gender identification long before puberty which makes post-pubescent arousal a symptom of gender dysphoria and not its cause.

Secondly, sexual feelings for the opposite sex can interfere with that identification until the person figures out what their ultimate orientation might be which, for some, is decided post transition. Calling this target location error is completely erroneous since the person understands exactly what is happening to them.

What I surmise is that during the formation of a sexual being every aspect of that person's thought processes is carried through the transition into puberty thus creating a unique imprint that cannot be easily altered. In other words, passing through that doorway with whatever you are carrying will impact your erotic imprinting. That individual is t…

a conventional life

I did actually start out with the intent of living a conventional life but it turns out that I wasn’t for me. But it wasn't for lack of trying.

I plunged myself head first into things and did what I thought was expected all the while running into mental road blocks through trying to suppress who I was. Those domestic suburban years when my children were young were busy and I was able to concentrate on soccer and hockey practices, doctor's appointments and mowing lawns. This is what most of us from our generation did to the best of our ability.

Now this void of not being needed quite so intensely is sometimes hard to get used to and I oscillate between nostalgia a newly found sense of freedom.

Each stage of life is far from perfect and while we are embroiled in them we cannot appreciate fully because we are so intensely living the experience. That mindfulness that should accompany each segment sometimes gets jettisoned only to appear later as rose coloured memories we can savo…

the value in suffering and the mundane

There is value in the mundane and ordinary because that is where we spend most of our lives. Think of this part of life as the vegetables while the steak and dessert are those fleeting moments where we celebrate unexpected euphoria.

Mark Manson’s book is called “The Subtle Art of not Giving a F*ck” and it deals with high expectations we place for our lives and the increasing focus on having it all. We celebrate the special and unique in everyone forgetting that not everyone will be and place emphasis on finding it at all costs lest we fail to measure up. We have found a way to strip suffering and hard work from the formula of life which allows through contrast to know the happiness we seek. That struggle lived is part of the journey which leads to true fulfillment through learned experience.

When I was young the old adage was that it’s about the journey and not the destination and one of the unavoidable parts of the human condition is suffering. Yet with its experience comes the forma…